Revising and editing your work

Here is an example of the essay we are currently working on. 

We are learning to revise and edit our work. The above is an example of the first draft.
Students will re-write their essays numerous times, as we continue to learn how to independently edit our work.

All comments made on the above draft were made by students in class. This is a fantastic example of how peer editing helps to shape and revise student work.